Letting Go

I feel I should start this post by saying I didn't like any of this...not one bit. If I was a drinker, I would've gone home afterwards and poured me a shot (or two) of that Brown Liquor...but I'm not. All I could do was hold myself together as best I could as I released just a bit more of the tether that secures my baby girl to me...

My girl went to her 8th Grade Junior Prom. Ohhhh man, I had such a hard time with. I'm sure every mother out there understands what I mean. It really does seem like it was just yesterday I was holding my little, perfect baby girl in my arms. She was exactly what I had prayed for. And now, here she is, all dressed up and pretty...a young lady.

This is her last year at Middle School...come the fall, she will be a Freshman in High School.

I don't like it...

But what can I do...I can't stop time. All I can really do is keep on working with her, teaching her the things I think she needs to know and giving her a good example of what a lady is.

I have to give myself a pat on the back because I pulled off everything for her to be able to attend her prom on a shoe string budget...and I do mean shoestring. Not both of the strings...just one LOL. I definately have to thank two of my co-workers (you know who you are). One of them gave Precious the opportunity to get a free dress in exchange for doing a couple hours of community service. The other actually gave Precious this dress...yes I said "gave" (well, really it was my co-worker's Mother). So I didn't even have to buy one. When I brought this dress home to her, it didn't look like much hanging up but when she put it on....she looked like a princess...it was perfect. We both knew that this dress was the one. Had she not liked it we would've gone on a manhunt to every mall in the DFW area until we found one she did.

We found her shoes and jewelry without much effort.

 My pretty girl outside the hotel entrance

Precious & one of her best friends

As the days went by, and the date of the Prom drew nearer, she because more and more excited. All of her little friends at school were talking about the big event. She was also super nervous. This was her first formal event, first time wearing heels (she wore a pair of strappy sandles that boasted a three inch heel). The day of prom, I went to work on her. Gave her a perm, did her nails myself. The hardest part was her hair. She wanted some tracks put in because she wanted color in her hair. I did that myself. It took me two hours to glue it in. I was stressed and so was she cause as I was doing it...it was NOT looking good. I was doing my best to reassure her it would turn out fine (when I was scared to death I was going to mess it up for her on her big day) and in the end, it was fantastic. She wanted to wear it down and I wanted her to wear it up because of the type of dress she had and also because I wanted the jewelry to be seen, I ended up compromising and put half of it up but left the back half down.

When we arrived at the hotel where it was to be held (Max & I drove her there...she'd tried to ask me about having a date but I told her early on HELL NAH...that wasn't about to happen on my shift) she met all of her friends in the very front. It was the cutest thing. They were all squealing and jumping up and down, telling each other how pretty they looked. I, of course, made everybody pose for 50 billion pictures.

 Precious & some of her classmates

 This is one of my favorite pictures of Precious and her friend. I just love how this little girl is posing, all prissy...too cute.

As I looked at her with her friends, everybody all dressed up and excited, I felt what my mother must've felt when I was going to my prom, pride and sadness mixed together.

Let me just say this though, I was very surprised (although I shouldn't have been) at what some of those little girls were wearing. Skin tight, very short, dresses that were so low cut I thought the hotel was holding open auditions for Pretty Woman II. Why would you send your 8th grader out the house looking like that? Why as a parent would you even buy that kind of dress for a 14-15yr old? Some of these parents out here be on that ISH! Teach the baby what it is to be a lady, how to carry yourself like one, how to dress like one. Just rediculous.

My little niece, Taysia, also went to prom but she got to take a date. I remember when her and my sis-in-law told me, I was like "The hell you say!" but I had to remember, she is 15yrs old. I ran in to them after I'd followed Precious into the hotel. Taysia and her date arrived about half hour after we did so I was glad I caught her because I'd wanted to get some pictures of her too. She looked so very pretty.

Well, this is one more milestone bringing both of them closer to high school...and growing up.

Baseball

Before soccer season began, I found out that Max's coach wasn't going to be coaching (he's been Max's coach for the last three soccer seasons). Well, since he wasn't going to be coaching, Maxwell didn't want to play soccer...he decided instead to give baseball a try (we both really liked his coach and Max said he didn't want to play for anybody else). So baseball it was.

He loved absolutely everything about it and took it really seriously. He was pretty hard on himself for the first half of the season because at practice, he had a pretty good batting average but at the games he couldn't hit a THING! I told him that it was understandable because at practice it was just him, his teammates and coaches but at games, there were two very large crowds yelling and cheering their team on. It was only natural he was nervous. But as the season wore on, he found his rhythm...even scored some homeruns.

I loved to see him out on the field playing. Precious and I attended every one of his games and practices...we were his own personal cheering section. I do have to say that we had a fantastic bunch of kids playing and a great group of parents & extended family that attended the games. We all cheered for each others kids and made each kid feel the team spirit.

Max was First Baseman...hmm, I wonder if I said that right? His job was to guard the first base and he was awsome at it.

 Here he is running to 1st base after hitting the ball

 A little pre-game catching practice with a teammate

Stealing 2nd base...Max (nor his teammates) didn't play, that joker would still a base on you in a minute!

Strike one! However, that's not what's import. Notice the form, the face...JUST DO IT!



This is my favorite picture. He looks serious...all about the next play. He looks like he's been doing this for year. This is the money shot picture...years from now, when he's in the Majors and the press comes to me for pics of him in the early years, this will be the one I make sure they highlight.



39...and LOVING It

This is what 39 looks like...I think I'm holding it together pretty good. Sure...I could stand to loose some weight and there are more wrinkles than there were at 29 but overall, I'm looking pretty darn good.

What you can't see...what is absolutely GOURGEOUS is what's inside! I say this without conceit because it is true. The following is an excerpt from my journal tonight: "At 39 I am so much smarter, braver and wiser than I've ever been before. I'm learning to actually experience my like, to bea  full participant in each and every moment instead of moving thru it like a horse with blinders on...I've always know I was strong and capable but this last year I've amazed myself. I didn't know 1/2 of what I was capable of..."

I'm excited about my future...it's all laid out before me just waiting for me to shape and mold it into what I want it to be.

The following pictures are from a small birthday Soiree (thanks Dion Nashe for that phrase..I LOVE it) I threw for myself...

Me and Sissy

Me and Dulce (Candy

My Shenita Lynn (I want boots like her's when I grow up)

Me and Dion Nashe

Me and my Loretta Lynn



 Loretta made and entire Cream Cheese Poundcake just for me...just for my birthday. OMG! This is the BEST poundcake I've had in all my life. I'd marry it if I could. Although in certain societies this would be frowned upon...I believe if you ate just a slice, you to would propose.

I belive she might be holding the fire

2011 is going to be my year...I can just feel it. One of many more to come...my freedom was hard earned but damn well worth it!



Update

Where have I been?

What have I been doing?

How's the divorce coming along?

Wouldn't you like to know....

Stay tuned for updates

Just Had to Share...

Ok one of my bosses told me about this today...HILARIOUS!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MAX...Yep, a Little Belated

Yep...this lil' ole boi right here turned ten whole years old this past Tuesday, June 22nd. I know, every parent says it..."He/she was just born yesterday. How is it possible he/she is _____ years old?" It's true. I remember holding this perfect boy God made just for me, for the very first time and here he is a decade old. When I asked him what he wanted to do for his special day, he gave me a list of four very reasonable requests to chose from (He's just the best, most thoughtful boy ever). I picked the Train Museum and Nickle Mania (an arcade).

The following pictures are from the Train Musuem

Anything having to do with trains, my boy loves. He's been facinated with them since he was a bitty little boy.

Out of all of the trains at the museum, this was Max's favorite. The Big Boy...the largest steam locomotive ever built. There are only seven remaining in the world and the train museum had two. We were all in awe of how HUGE this thing is. I mean, we've all seen trains before but this thing was unbelievable.

Look how big the wheels are compaired to us...I'm 5' 5" just to give you some perspective.

I loved seeing his reaction. How excited he was, how he went from train to train exploring, telling me interesting facts and trivia. He talks all the time of not being able to wait until he's grown up so he can drive trains eveyday.

Look at my sassy girl posing...she's not camera-shy at all.

The Santa Fe was my favorite train, I loved its bright colors, all sleek and shiney looking like it could carry me to places full of adventure.

Up next on the Birthday Celebration Train was lunch at Ci Ci's Pizza for lunch per Max's request (i didn't get any pics of that) then to Nickel Mania. An arcade where the games use nickels. I gave both Max and Precious their own cups of nickels and let them have at it.

Precious had more tickets than Max but being the sweet big sister she is (when she wants to be...smile) she shared with her little brother. They put their tickets together and split them. All in all, despite the heat, we all had a great day.

Very Funny

Sharing this cuz I think it's flipping hilarious. What's not funny is that it was my children that showed it to me

I can see I'm gonna have to homeschool them and edit their tv watching back to PBS Kids...